Amid all the doubts that I have about homeschooling (and when I say "doubts", I should clarify that I don't doubt that it's what I want or that I believe that it is best for my children, but I doubt because it's not the "normal" thing to do here and so many people still think a little less of it than makes me comfortable) I keep coming back to one thing that re-affirms my decision: the mothers of schooled children.
Ironically, without me even bringing up the subject of school, mother after mother will tell me that "everything changes when they go to school," or "just wait until they get to school, then they really grow up," or "we had to deal with a lot of negative things they were getting in school" and on and on and on.
And yet they still look at me funny when I say that "actually,.....I'm homeschooling for the first several years...." (Yes, I intend to let my children go to high school if they want since I did enjoy it, but we'll cross that bridge when we get there....)
Anyway, I also know a few parents in our town who's children were Boom's classmates and friends growing up. And when we see these parents in town and ask about their children, too many answer, "Well, they haven't been around lately....you know how kids are." To which in my head I reply, "No. I don't. I can't imagine not seeing my own parents often, and I sure hope my kids never stay away for long from us (barring being across the country or in another country, of course.)
And I couldn't help but conjure up a picture in my head as I thought of all these parents who obviously have lost some connection with their children. Maybe it's as simple as their child growing up too quickly, or some bad language acquired, but overall I see the same look in their faces that they must have felt or still feel somewhat out of control of circumstances. And even though I know each child must make their own choices in life, I believe as parents we have the ability to channel those choices and influence them as much as possible.
And in a world where it seems children are bobbing about in a sea of uncertainties and waves are pulling them away from their families, I see homeschooling as a life preserver that will keep my kids afloat and stable. Maybe there are kids out there who will be able to swim despite the storms of the sea - I was one (in the sense that I maintained a relatively good relationship to my parents.) But those will be few. Too many more will be pulled down by a strong current, or will drift with the latest trend.
I'm not trying to "protect my kids from the world" so that they are sheltered and don't know how to cope. On the contrary, I'm trying to teach them to swim, and until they are strong enough and mature enough to swim on their own, I will make sure I have that life saver available to keep them from going under....to keep them close to me so that as they drift away I simply tug the line in.
I don't think it's wrong to be the biggest influence in their lives instead of other children who are only as bright as their years allow them to be. I don't think it's wrong that we will be their main peers instead of insecure children who judge by shifting measures instead of the true person inside. I don't think it's wrong to give them a firm foundation to stand on before sending them off.
I think it's the best way to show them that we think they are worth the work and time it will take to ensure they have a true understanding of who they are in Christ and where their place in this world is.
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